i wish i had more fantastical things to write about. it's summer, so i'm lazy and life is semi-dull.
one thing though is God has definitely taught me to never say never to him... within just this year i said to God "i will never have kids" and not long ago i caught myself getting excited about the thought of having lil babies ^_^ then i also said i'd "never go back to SES" aaaaaaand i'm back there. haha...
a friend of mine from SES actually got me thinking the other day....... how often am i just silent? so much of my life is filled with music. i've ALWAYS got music playing... then the other day i had some time to kill so i was sitting in my car waiting for people and i just sat there... quietly. no music... not saying much... just sat. it actually brought me to tears. i haven't just sat quietly before the Lord in a very long time. i talk to Him, a lot... but rarely do i just sit quietly before Him. i wish i had the prayer life i had when i was like 3 years old. i became a Christian at a very very young age... i used to pray like a freakin warrior. my mom would tell people at church to ask me to pray for them if they needed prayer... i was that kinda kid... you asked me to pray for you, and i would! and it was none of those "hey God, could you uh... you know... help them?" it was like close to an hour long prayer......... what happened? why don't i do that anymore? why don't i desire that anymore? how do i get that desire back? i guess, just, start praying? maybe it's like working out....... kinda hard to get in the habit of going, but once you start you love it? maybe? hopefully...
k. that's all for now. i'll actually write when i have something interesting to write about instead of just "today my day was ____" laaaaaaaaaame....
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